Give Mia Break!

           Oh, no. It’s another Lucy episode. I wish they’d stop filming these; I don’t even get paid.

          This time I was at the nail salon. I’ve been going there for years, where Ethan does my nails in 30 minutes flat. We usually chat, usually about his darling 4-year-old, Mia.

          Only this time, I saw a cooking show on his cell phone and we started talking about food and recipes. Before you can say, “The oven timer’s done,” he was finished, at which point I paid and made a new appointment.

          I was standing up to leave when I remembered his daughter and said, “Give Mia a hug.”

          He came around the table, squeezed my shoulders, and I left, puzzled.

          ONLY THEN DID I REALIZE THAT HE THOUGHT I SAID, “GIVE ME A HUG!”

          This is a DISASTER! Too mortified to even go back in and explain, I got in the car and peeled out, totally embarrassed. Yes, I know I should have handled it right then, but I didn’t.

          I went home and wailed to St. Bob.

          Ethan probably thinks I’ve turned into one of these flirty old women who snuggle up to men and wink at them. EWWW!

          Now I have to summon the courage to bring it up again when I go there next, and explain the misunderstanding. WHY DID HE HAVE TO NAME HIS KID MIA? THIS IS A CATASTROPHE JUST WAITING TO HAPPEN!

          Mama Mia.

          And, speaking of Moms, you can join 10K subscribers, and watch hundreds of short life hacks on my Youtube Mom channel, right here!

Bubble Heads?

           The other day, my buddy Cori and I were speculating about what it will be like in heaven.  I was telling her about all my joints that need replacing. Both knees and both hips. So far. Hypermobility does this to you.

            And I said, “What I also need is a neck replacement, but I can’t quite picture how they’d do that.” Maybe that's why you never hear about it.

We agreed that the next life would be pain free, and imagined me without a neck (and hence without a body) just bopping around as a free-floating head. I mean, I use it so much more than I use the rest of my body.

          In fact, there could be a whole area for this, where we just park our bodies and enter a special Head Zone where our heads are encased in clear bubbles. We could transport them anywhere we want to go.

          But no soccer players allowed.

Hey, join 10K other subscribers who get my Youtube Mom life hacks right here.