Do you know anyone who has stolen something from the LDS Conference Center DURING a church General Conference? Yes you do—me.
For my non-Mormon readers, let me explain that twice a year there’s a huge gathering of Latter-day Saints in Salt Lake City at the gigantic Conference Center (which seats 21,000), for several sessions of talks from our leaders along with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir performing throughout. It’s quite a big deal and standing in line earlier this month, we met a man from Angola who had flown 36 hours just to attend it. Here’s how big it is:
So, to process thousands of people through a security check, it’s a bit of a mob scene. Organized, but still a mob. It was raining, so we all put our purses, umbrellas, whatnot, on a long series of tables, then picked them up at the end of the long assembly line.
Only my umbrella was missing. Great. Someone with a similar one must have picked mine up. So I grabbed the one that most resembled mine, and took off for our seats. But I was disappointed. The one I had to settle for was not as nice as the one I was borrowing from my daughter.
After the session, we headed out. And as I reached into my purse to turn my cell phone back on, what should I find but MY UMBRELLA! This meant I had stolen someone else’s—someone who is now going to get drenched, thanks to me. I cannot tell you how terrible I felt. I had obviously forgotten that I had collapsed my umbrella and stuffed it into my purse. I left the other one at the scene of the crime, but doubt very much that it found its owner.
And so I am confessing to this dastardly deed and hoping that someone out there can forgive the dingdong who made off with their umbrella. If only there were a LOST & FOUND for our brains.
I’d love to make a YouTube Mom video about how to remember you’ve already stowed your umbrella, but I fear not many of you really need the help I do!