Tuesday, March 12, 2024

Carmel Sauce

          What do you do when your computer crashes? You go to Carmel-by-the-Sea. 


This time of year the hills looked like Ireland as we started our trip. 

 At last we arrived at this charming little village 



where sunsets are gorgeous,


food is amazing, 

 

          and there are even a bunch of fairytale cottages to find, built by Hugh Comstock for his wife, exactly 100 years ago.



          We drove past Pebble Beach, 

and enjoyed the fact that the seals are all gathered at Bird Rock, and the birds are all gathered at Seal Rock.

     

   This Frank Lloyd Wright house just sold for $22 million.


There are lots of other homes still on the market, but let’s just say it helps if you’re a billionaire.

          However, for the fabulous price of FREE, you can enjoy dozens and dozens of my Youtube Mom life hack videos.

Tuesday, March 5, 2024

Write This Down

           Are you still using Number 2 pencils? I know, I know, we use pens far more often, but most of us still own a few pencils. I use one to jot on a notepad beside my bed when I get ideas in the middle of the night.

          But don’t you wonder why we’re all using #2s? Why not #1s?  Aha! Today I shall enlighten you.

          First, pencil “leads” aren’t lead, but a mixture of graphite, clay, and water. The higher the number, the harder the core, and the lighter the marking is.

          Turns out that #1 pencils have more graphite, and thus make darker markings, so sign me up! I have always thought pencil marks were too light and skinny. I’m the same way with pens. I always choose bold over the fine tip.

          But here’s why: I have terrible handwriting. It looks like I’m in 3rd grade.  This means that a wider, smudgier line is more forgiving than a sharp point, and my handwriting looks cleaner with it. You may have gorgeous printing, in which case you can use any tip you like.

          So back to #2 pencils. It’s the standard here because it’s average, right in the middle of the grading scale. But only in the US, folks. This designation doesn’t exist in the rest of the world.


          Still, why so many kinds? Art. Drafting. Some people want very precise tips. And if you want a challenge, try writing with a super-hard 10H pencil. On the other hand, I hear that Japanese pencils add wax and other additives, to give dark, yet non-smudgy results.



          Last bit of pencil trivia for you: Henry David Thoreau’s family manufactured pencils, and he worked with his father, even inventing a new way to grind the graphite.  
          And now you will never see a common pencil in the same way again.

          However, you can see my Youtube Mom videos whether you own a pencil or not. Check out dozens of life hacks on my channel!

Tuesday, February 27, 2024

Currying Favor

           I’ve told you before that our four kids are comedians. Not professionally, just happenstance-ily.

          We were on a Facetime call last weekend, all sharing what’s new in our lives, when Nicole mentioned that she is seeing someone, and that he brought curry over and they watched a documentary by a Swedish guy with a Hispanic name.

          “What was in the curry?” everyone wanted to know.  She listed a few ingredients.


          “That’s good that he can cook,” someone said.

          “And why does the Swedish documentary guy have a Spanish name?”

          She pointed out that lots of people who live in Sweden are from somewhere else.

          I frowned. I like the dolls in It’s a Small World to stay in their assigned spots. No hula dancers wiggling off to the igloo area, no one in a sombrero joining the can-can dancers.


          There were more questions about the curry. What kind of rice? How was the meat seasoned?

          Someone asked our daughter-in-law, Tiffany, about her upcoming yoga retreat and she said that her students’ trauma was a heavy thing for them to carry.

          “Especially when they have to carry it doing all those hard poses,” Brandon pointed out.


          Then Cassidy asked Brandon how many kids he has (which is zero), and complimented him on his Dad joke.

          “I like how Nicole mentioned she’s seeing someone, and all anyone asked about was the curry,” I said.

          “Well, and the documentary,” Brandon added. Yes, good point. Another successful family gathering.

Have you seen my latest Youtube Mom videos?  Hundreds of life hacks you can watch right where you’re sitting. With or without your family.

Tuesday, February 20, 2024

World Champion Haggler

          I honestly think St. Bob should come with a warning sign. It would say, “Enter into negotiations with this man at your own risk.”

          He competes at this “game” like it’s the Chiseling Olympics, and he’s defending his gold medal. If he gets even a whiff that a price is negotiable, the day is gone and he will wheedle and bargain until closing time. Had he been born in a country with open markets and flexible prices, I would never see him again.

          But in the U.S. this hobby is pretty much restricted to car dealerships. And heaven help the car salesman who doesn’t match Bob’s talents. It is a point of pride that Bob can finagle a make and model for less money than anyone else you will ever hear of.

          This week he sold his SUV, so the haggling began. Over and over he “walked away.”  At one point he told me he really did want a certain car, so I said, “Then call and tell them.”


          Ha! He looked at me like I was crazy and said, “Whoever calls next loses.”  There’s a method to his madness and he can tell exactly when the salesman is ready to lower the price, throw in a warranty, and include a new set of tires.

          Finally it was over. “Did you get the price you wanted?” I asked.

          “Even lower,” he said. “Plus he threw in new floor mats, a tank of gas, and Sirius FM.”

          Good grief. No wonder he was so good as the host of NBC TV’s Let’s Make a Deal during the 90s. These poor salesmen haven’t got a chance.

          Yes, you can watch episodes of St. Bob wheeling and dealing, but don’t forget to watch a few of my Youtube Mom life hack videos as well!

Tuesday, February 13, 2024

Okay, but.. a Shark?

           Last week California had a record-breaking storm. Buckets of rain, and amazingly, 61-mile-an-hour winds. 70 is a hurricane, so you can imagine tree limbs, roof tiles, and even garbage cans blowing sideways.

          It sounded like a freight train and caused several power outages. At one point I looked out at the front street and there, crumpled up on our lawn, was a shark!

          Okay, a pool shark.

          Okay, not that kind of pool shark. An inflatable one for a swimming pool.

          Although it would have been cool if various sea creatures had blown into the neighborhood, all the way from the coast.

          I ran back to grab my phone and take a picture. But in the few seconds it took, the shark had blown away, probably to San Francisco.

          Maybe those are the real lyrics to the song! I left my shark…. In San Francisco…

          We survived the onslaught with only some fence damage, but somewhere a family is missing its pool floatie.

          Weather-- or sharp teeth-- keeping you inside? That’s a perfect time to watch my Youtube Mom life hacks!

Tuesday, February 6, 2024

You're in a Band?

           We had just gone to bed last night when St. Bob told me his shoulder was hurting again.

          “Aren’t you doing physical therapy for it?” I asked.

          And here’s where the story breaks down. Evidently he went to PT and thought they’d have him lift some weights. 

          But, instead, he was shown how to use one of those wide resistance bands.


“And everybody doing it was about 900 years old and I hate that frickin’ place, so I left.”  (pause) “And I went to Burger King.”

          “But if you’d try what they said to do—”

          “It’s rubber bands!  Rubber bands!” Bob said, getting worked up.


          And now I’m giggling uncontrollably. I can just picture him refusing to join a geriatric group. Bob would rather live in denial than rehab his shoulder.

          He recommends the Double Whopper, no onions, extra pickles.

          And I recommend my Youtube Mom channel here. You might not heal your shoulder, but you’ll learn a lot of life hacks.

Tuesday, January 30, 2024

Who Nose?

           A friend of mine stopped by to visit, and told me she had a “Joni Moment” this week.

          Aha, I thought, time to find out just what that means. Does it mean she thought of a brilliant invention, a life-saving device, a solution to the world’s woes?

          Of course not. She accidentally brushed eyeliner on the end of her nose. She was switching from one eye to the other, got too close, and brushed a wide swath of black on the tip of her nose.


          Mind you, I am sitting there with my own black splotch on the end of my nose. But mine is a scar repair-- from skin cancer--  with stitches, and looks like a little spider with turquoise legs (the thread). I am told to put Vaseline on it twice a day, and that’s how we know it isn’t an actual spider, because it just holds still for this.


          I sighed. I also remembered that whenever I get a hot flash and pick up a fan to wave it, I smack my nose with it.

          So, if you see me sporting a black spot on the end of my nose, you need not worry that I smudged my makeup. I merely had my unicorn horn smoothed out.

          See if you can see it on my Youtube Mom life hack videos right here.