Tuesday, March 29, 2016

Where Are You?

Honestly, I think I need a bullhorn.  And I need to take it into the parking lots of apartment buildings and simply yell, “Where is Marion Davies?”  Only I’ll use the actual name of the person I’m looking for, instead of a deceased movie star.
          Here’s the problem.  And it’s a problem all over America (have not surveyed other nations yet):  YOU CAN’T FIND ANYBODY.  A least not a body who lives in a large apartment complex.
          My church does what I think is a very cool thing.  We visit every single member, every single month. At least, ideally.  This way no one can go homeless, hungry, or even frustrated for very long, without someone coming to their rescue with meals, wheels, and a shoulder to cry on. But this also means I am constantly driving into apartment building parking lots where I cannot find specific residents.  It begins with the map:
          These maps are miniscule, and cannot be read from your car. 
Even in the dark of night (bring a flashlight), you must get out of your car and walk up to the sign where, with a good magnifying glass, you might be able to locate the unit you want.

But the buildings don’t always go in order.  You might see Building 11 right next to Building 35.  And then 19.  And then 4. 
Even if you know roughly where their building is, once you get into the belly of the beast, you find that the building numbers are no longer visible.  This can be due to the numbers NOT EVEN BEING POSTED, or due to fluffy trees
Or due to parking rooftops which block the numbers from any location where your car can legally drive.
And heaven help you if you wait until evening when it’s dark, because then you have no chance whatsoever of finding the correct building or unit.  And the chicken soup is getting cold, the ice cream bars are melting, and someone who actually lives here and knows his way around, is right on your back bumper flashing his brights so you’ll get a move-on.
So I am pleading—begging—builders of apartment complexes to forget entirely about the word “complex” and switch it for the word “simple.”  Follow the lead of tech folks, and make your structures user friendly.  We could all get used to saying, “Apartment Simple” and every time we said it, we’d smile.

Far easier to navigate is my website, with lovely tabs that can take you to my YouTube Mom videos, and of course my user friendly books.

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