Friday, August 9, 2013

Mind the Gap

Aha.  “Mind the Gap” made you think of England, right? 

And those signs they have that say, “Watch Your Step” in America, right?

            Well this is a whole ‘nuther kind of gap.  I went on a vacation to Charleston, South Carolina with three girlfriends some time ago, mostly to do genealogy, since that’s where my mother was born.  However, with friends in tow, such trips soon become shopping junkets and mansion tours as well.  It even morphed into a bit of a road trip when we decided to take in Savannah, Georgia, long as we were in the area.
            On the way there, we noticed a fruit stand and decided to stop and buy some local produce. 

 A kindly gentlemen undoubtedly heard our touristy chatter and said, “Excuse me, but have you ladies ever had Muscadine grape juice?”  Oh, we were quick to inform him, we come from the Number One grape-growing state in the nation.  We’ve had all kinds of grape juice.
            “But have you ever had Muscadine grape juice?” he asked. 

 Well, actually, no.  Muscadine grapes only grow in the South, as it turns out.  His eyes lit up. “Then they’s a gap in yo’ sophistication,” he gently informed us.
            Yes, a gap, indeed.  AND WE CAN’T HAVE THAT, NOW CAN WE?  Imagine living your whole life without ever tasting Muscadine grape juice!  We eagerly sampled this exotic, new product rather than drive one more mile with such a gaping hole in our sophistication. 

 And, of course, this phrase has now become our excuse to try all kinds of new things, rather than endure an inferior grasp of fine culture.  Spanx underwear?  We must try that.  A Brazilian Blowout? Bring it on.  Colored jeans?  But of course.  Painting chevron stripes in a room?  Obviously.
So far we’ve closed the gap quite nicely on food trends and fashion fads.  But we still have to cross off unicycling, sky diving, pole dancing, and getting shot out of a cannon.  So many gaps, so little time.
Close the gap in your sophistication and buy one of my new novels!  Check out the reviews at Amazon, then purchase a Kindle version or a hard copy version from  Waaay better than grape juice.

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