Can I please be in the Vial Olympics? I don’t expect to be in the real ones. Heck, I doubt they’d even give someone this unathletic a seat on the back row.
But blood samples I got. At my last lab appointment, this is what I saw waiting for me on the table:
That’s right. SEVENTEEN vials to fill. Have you ever heard of such a collection? There should be several gold medals hanging around my neck right now. Although I’d probably be too weak to support them and they’d pull me down onto the floor.
It’s not that I don’t appreciate thorough testing. It’s that I start to wonder if this sort of thing could be sponsored by the transfusion center. And how can you get an accurate reading of anemia if you withdraw all your blood? (Yes, I came out anemic.)
Seriously, doesn’t this make you want to start humming that old “99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall” song, only with the lyrics, “99 vials of blood on the wall”?
Among the many tests we ran, one was for my Vitamin B-12 count. You’ll like this. The normal range is from 211 to 911 pg/mL. Guess what mine was?
That’s right. Five THOUSAND something. And I don’t get a gold medal for this? I say it’s just time to end all the vial-ence.
Time to check out my short Youtube Mom life hack videos, too, before I keel over.