My Brilliant Christmas Idea

             Okay, hear me out. Not all of us get our entire families together on Christmas. There are trade-off agreements with in-laws and exes, work schedules, travel expenses, and all kinds of reasons why your family might be missing a few people this year.

            But here’s the solution: Bump the holiday. Hey, Jesus wasn’t even born in December; we all know that. So pick the next weekend, or the next one when flight costs return to normal.

            You’ll still have all the wonderful times together, the memories, the wacky disasters you’ll laugh at for years. They just don’t have to happen on the exact date of Christmas. Then BOTH sides of the family get the excitement of opening gifts, enjoying a feast together, singing carols, taking selfies in front of the tree, making a gingerbread house, playing games, re-enacting the nativity, and all the other traditions you hold dear. You can even take advantage of the after-Christmas sales!

             Brilliant, right? I know. Meanwhile, how about a holiday for neuro-divergent thinkers who come up with this ingenious stuff?

            And check out my Youtube Mom videos—hundreds of quick life hacks you’ll love.

Stick 'em up!

          I’m told one reason we see so many movies and TV shows which  include bank robberies, is that so many people fantasize about robbing a bank.

          I fantasize about how to prevent it. And I have a solution that will knock your socks off, but not your money out of your wallet.

I watched  my own local bank go from a face-to-face moment with the teller, to an interaction with plexiglass where you slide your ID under the barrier and speak through tiny holes.  Today they also have video cameras everywhere, and signs posted which forbid hats, sunglasses, and hoodies. My guess is they still have to worry.

Too bad no one ever called me for advice.  My solution is to put all banks on the second floor.  By the time a robber can get down the elevator or staircase, you’ve called the police, locked the lower level doors, and voila! No more bank robberies.

          I seriously believe this could prevent 99% of all bank robberies.  And, with elevators, the bank is still completely accessible to any member of the public.

          Building a two-story bank is more costly, but who says you have to build it?  Why not just rent the upper floor of an already-existing business?  Or build it and rent the bottom part out.  Bank-and-bagels, anyone?

          I know, you love the idea. You’re welcome. You can thank me by purchasing one of my books here.  Then I’ll get to deposit the royalties and maybe blog about witnessing a bank robbery!