Tuesday, March 24, 2015

Signing Up

You may recall that my last blog post was about visiting a friend in the hospital.  But what you did not know is that this is the sign posted just inches from the entrance:
          To my way of thinking, this beats a “No Solicitors” sign all to pieces.  Seriously, is there a message more opposite of “Welcome”?  What I like is the bottom part, urging you to “Give them distance and respect.”  Can’t you just see it?  A rattler’s fangs are sunk into your ankle and you’re shaking your foot, yelling, “But I respected you!” 
          This is not the only curious sign in my neck of the woods.  Sometimes you find amusing signs in local supermarkets.  I love a bargain, so from time to time I stroll down the aisle of a decidedly discounted market where you can find not only low prices, but low humor:
          It makes you wonder if people who are unable to control their bladders are all gathered on that aisle, having a support meeting.
          Another store, another aisle, we see listings of general categories.  And then, suddenly, a specific brand of a specific item: Pop Tarts.  But get this: There are no Pop Tarts on that aisle, anywhere.
          Even on the roadways there are curious signs.  This truck’s sign says Electrick Motorsports: 
          And maybe that extra K is because a guy named Rick owns it, who knows?  But it reminds me of a campaign poster: Elect Rick. In any case, he has my vote because I like golf carts and that’s what they sell.  Not sure if driving in a golf cart is an actual sport, but then the way I’d drive one, I think it might qualify.

You’ve simply got to buy my humorous novel, Sisters in the Mix. The main character fixes the grammar on public signs, among other pursuits.  And if you’ve never actually done that, at least you can live vicariously.

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